10.12.2007

Honey...can't you stop doing that?

So as I was running errands yesterday I overheard this conversation between an elderly couple:

(Both walk to car, woman is driving, woman pushes the unlock button on keychain, man goes for handle, man cannot open door)

Woman: (Irritated tone) You always do that. Everytime I try to unlock the door you grab it too early. You do it all the time.
Man: (silence)
Woman: Why do you do that all the time? You need to wait until until it unlocks and then open it.

At first I thought this was pretty humorous. You know seeing a little old couple not getting technology. But then I got kinda sad. I thought about how this woman was nagging her husband in public for anyone around them to hear.

I take it very seriously as a wife to uplift my husband. When we got married I transformed from being Ferris "everything is about me" Ivester to Ferris "I am now one in the eyes of God with my husband" Joye. I want to make sure that I am a loving and encouraging wife to Wade at home, in public, around friends, around strangers, or alone at our house. And I know that if I ever start to have a spirit of nagging or put him down in any way then the possibility of me turning into that elderly nagging wife increases.

So some application...Every once in awhile I ask Wade how I have made him feel. Have I lifted him up in public? Have I ever embarrassed him? And sometimes I get an awesome report and sometimes I may find out I said something that hurt his feelings, but I didn't realize it. I think it is so important and helpful to get this perspective from your husband.
Then there are those times that your husband will never hear what you say about him. I have seen groups of women get together that were Christians and they just talked about the things their husbands have done or do that irritates them. It is one thing to share situations to godly women to get encouragement and prayer, but to put down your husband for the fun of it is never good. So ask your friends to keep you accountable. Tell them to call you out if you begin to share something with a critical attitude. And ultimately pray that you will be sensitive to what you are saying about your husband. You will love seeing how courageous and strong your husband feels when he knows that his wife is always on his side.

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